Birthday & Major Project

Birthdays…aren’t they suppose to be a special occasion? Well, normally they are but…it doesn’t feel like that way. Feels like every year you get older and you’re not getting any younger. You haven’t reached your goals and accomplish what you wanted to do that year and then you fail. Am I a failure for that? I don’t know…I feel like I am. I always have a fear of failing and it’s one of my lame fears. Does anyone feel the same or am I the only one? Seeing other people with their successful careers and I haven’t found mine. Well, I have sorta but it feels like I’m way behind my age mostly because I’m “different” from others. I’m still young tho so I have a long way to go and I have made some progress. Just gotta stick at it.

It’s less than 2 weeks til my next birthday and am I excited? To tell you the truth, not really. People will be puzzled with that and will be asking me why Kawika, why? They’ll be telling me it’s my special day and it’s a celebration of your life because I was born on that day. I guess for me and this coming birthday, I don’t really feel special. I mean with some of the past birthdays then yeah but now this year, I don’t feel like that. Maybe it’s my past that is making me feel this way or am I just thinking too much? Probably both I guess.

People tell me that I can be really cruel to myself and tells me that I should enjoy life more. They’re maybe right…just enjoy life while you can. Another friend told me last night to just live and embrace each moment because life is way too short to worry about. I do have plans to celebrate with family and friends so I should be looking forward to that.

Right now, I want to announce that I’m currently working on a major project on my blog. Basically, it’s an awareness of something that is really important to me and not a lot of people understands about it because they don’t know much about it or they haven’t experience themselves. I was originally supposed to publish the article back in July this year but like I said in my previous post because I was going through a tough time, I wasn’t able to finish it which was a bit unfortunate. At least, I can get to work on it a bit more. It’s taking longer than what I expected as I’ve been working on it for almost a year and a half now and really hope it’ll be worth it the end.

 

This is what Kawika In Sight is about, it’s mainly me blogging about my random life, thoughts, past experience and mainly reaching out to people. Writing or blogging is a way to express myself and I’ve actually been writing for a long time now. It’s being creative and it’s similar to me playing my guitar and piano and even art. But some of the things I write, probably not everyone agrees with me and that’s okay. We don’t all have the same mind. I might get positive feedback or negative ones from people and I can’t change them. That’s perfectly okay as it’s their opinions. I’m also cautious about what I write because sometimes it can come back to haunt you which I learnt that the hard way.

One of my goals is to be an inspiration to people. It probably sounds stupid to all of you but hey, that’s just me. I did write a few articles back in Year 8 which apparently it did impact on people’s lives in a positive way. Though I’m not sure if my upcoming major project will be all positive because it can be a controversial topic for some people but I guess we have to wait and find out next year. There may be a few people who might know what I’m talking about so I’m gonna leave it there.

I’ll try to keep on blogging whenever I can and I just realised this is the first time I’ve done a back to back post but like I said, it takes a lot of work to write one post. I’m now starting to get busy these days even when I’m having a gap year which is kinda hard to believe. I have no idea what’s my plan for next year and it’s kinda similar to last year because I wasn’t expecting to do an internship with SBS down in Canberra and going away to China to study Mandarin. It’s all happening fast and I have to keep at it.

I also want to say thanks to those who have been supporting me. It really means a lot to me and especially to those people who have always been with me in the very beginning. You guys are awesome!

Be random but stay safe all! ^_^

 

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